Thursday, 1 October 2015

Tension and cake

This is my record I've started 5 blogs yet to finish any. They're all a bit moany, a bit he said she said.

I nearly recounted the terrible tale of being blocked on twitter over a cheese sandwich.

I started telling the history of the month or the war of birthday attrition that we call September. A subtle blend of excitement, cake, jealousy, cake, fighting, six birthdays, a wedding anniversary and more bleeding cake. A bit too moany.

I half started to write about tone, the subtle and not so subtle shifts in the mood of the house that controls and underlies so much of our family life.

I pondered the number of adopters waiting and the number of children waiting, the ethics of continued recruitment and financial incentives. I was going to call it Cars: Part 2. I liked that one but I'm not so sure.

I had thought about older adoptees and the challenges for parents as they grow into young adults, family reintroduction that sort of stuff. I'm bored of my own voice.

The stuff I wanted to say, get off my chest, I can't say, I wan't to shout it from the rooftops but discretion and protection of the vulnerable takes priority.   I blog to get stuff off my chest to empty my head and clear out the thoughts but the choice to waiver anonymity comes with a responsibility. It's our lived experience but just a bit too out there, a bit too edgy, a bit scary.

Maybe I should start an anonymous blog.

9 comments:

  1. Aaaaah Mr C I know this is ur blog but what u have written is exactly what I wanted to say last night. Thank u, so completely robbing ur blog hope u don't mind. And sending all comfort and blessing to all the things u can't say. :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can forgive anything as you fed my 'hippy slop' and I'm eternally enriched.

      Delete
  2. We know what you can't say. Right there with ya.....

    ReplyDelete
  3. Right there with ya, more than ya know. Esp the September bday bit....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, I know that there's the stuff we can stay and the then theres the stuff we can't. Thank goodness for anonymous blogs.

      Delete
  4. An anonymous blog might be the way to go. It could really help others, too, as well as being therapeutic for you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The next anonymous blog to appear in the blogging world will be eyed with suspicion. Ha ha ha. I may have had an anonymous blog going for a while, you may think that, I couldn't possibly comment.

      Delete
  5. Oh yes September. Just to add to our 'excitement' this year was the September birthday coinciding with the 1st day back at school! Yay for us!

    I am mostly bored of my own voice, and the 'mood of the house' and the subtle stuff that I don't have the skills (or the energy) to articulate. I've toyed with blogging but they are the reasons I don't. I am counting on you and the other bloggers to have the energy to do what I can't :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Like you there's lots of good reasons not to blog and being open about my identity means that I have to to be careful and sensitive. On the whole it works out ok. Thanks for commenting.

      Delete