Friday 2 October 2015

Tension and cake

This is my record I've started 5 blogs yet to finish any. They're all a bit moany, a bit he said she said.

I nearly recounted the terrible tale of being blocked on twitter over a cheese sandwich.

I started telling the history of the month or the war of birthday attrition that we call September. A subtle blend of excitement, cake, jealousy, cake, fighting, six birthdays, a wedding anniversary and more bleeding cake. A bit too moany.

I half started to write about tone, the subtle and not so subtle shifts in the mood of the house that controls and underlies so much of our family life.

I pondered the number of adopters waiting and the number of children waiting, the ethics of continued recruitment and financial incentives. I was going to call it Cars: Part 2. I liked that one but I'm not so sure.

I had thought about older adoptees and the challenges for parents as they grow into young adults, family reintroduction that sort of stuff. I'm bored of my own voice.

The stuff I wanted to say, get off my chest, I can't say, I wan't to shout it from the rooftops but discretion and protection of the vulnerable takes priority.   I blog to get stuff off my chest to empty my head and clear out the thoughts but the choice to waiver anonymity comes with a responsibility. It's our lived experience but just a bit too out there, a bit too edgy, a bit scary.

Maybe I should start an anonymous blog.

9 comments:

  1. Aaaaah Mr C I know this is ur blog but what u have written is exactly what I wanted to say last night. Thank u, so completely robbing ur blog hope u don't mind. And sending all comfort and blessing to all the things u can't say. :-)

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    1. I can forgive anything as you fed my 'hippy slop' and I'm eternally enriched.

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  2. We know what you can't say. Right there with ya.....

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  3. Right there with ya, more than ya know. Esp the September bday bit....

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    1. Thanks, I know that there's the stuff we can stay and the then theres the stuff we can't. Thank goodness for anonymous blogs.

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  4. An anonymous blog might be the way to go. It could really help others, too, as well as being therapeutic for you.

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    1. The next anonymous blog to appear in the blogging world will be eyed with suspicion. Ha ha ha. I may have had an anonymous blog going for a while, you may think that, I couldn't possibly comment.

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  5. Oh yes September. Just to add to our 'excitement' this year was the September birthday coinciding with the 1st day back at school! Yay for us!

    I am mostly bored of my own voice, and the 'mood of the house' and the subtle stuff that I don't have the skills (or the energy) to articulate. I've toyed with blogging but they are the reasons I don't. I am counting on you and the other bloggers to have the energy to do what I can't :-)

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    1. Like you there's lots of good reasons not to blog and being open about my identity means that I have to to be careful and sensitive. On the whole it works out ok. Thanks for commenting.

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